IT CAME FROM BEYOND.

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[Pictured: Margaret Antwerp holds the fragment of alien satellite that landed in her rose garden.]

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It was a normal day for Margaret.

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Normal, that is, until a thundering crash in her front yard nearly knocked her house over.

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"This damn thing fell right out of space, I tell you," she told investigative journalists from our Paranormal Investigations department.

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"It was glowing red hot, and it had burnt my prize-winning roses to a crisp."

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The US government and air force have declined to comment, as usual.