GOVERNMENT FACILITIES BOMBED: In an apparent foreign attack (contradicting earlier Department of Defense denials of the disaster being caused by Chinese aggression) a coordinated bombing strike hit a wide number of US governmental facilities simultaneously yesterday, as well as numerous locations in isolate parts of the coastal United States.
A statement from the Pentagon has been issued, stating the strikes were the result of Chinese opportunism during the national crisis, and assured that action would be taken in kind against the aggressors.
Allegations that these sites contained top-secret government research facilities related to the disaster have been vehemently denied.