Automated Audio Transcript

Attention folks, this is DJ Dustbowl in with an emergency announcement for anyone that happens to be listening.

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I don't know if it's just localized to here or is widespread, but crap's going down outside.

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Reality's breaking, people, just like when this shitshow started.

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Stay indoors at all costs, close any curtains and barricade the doors for good measure, and, for the love of God, if you hear voices outside, ignore them!

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They're not human.

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We're going to be going off air and heading below ground while this crapshoot runs its course.

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Have faith, people, we'll all get through this one as well.

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Just don't go loony on me, and again, don't, listen, to the voices!